Monday, May 29, 2006

Posing

What is it with men and the need to brag? I have a friend, we'll call him...S&T. He likes to blog about how he's an asshole and how it pisses him off sooo much when people tell him how sweet he is. The trouble is...he is sweet. He blogsabout how he aches to feel a womans hand on his chest. He couldn't be an asshole if he tried. He's a polite gentleman and yet he still feels this incessant need to stagger around going I'm a bad ass. Boys will be boys I guess lol but guys, you're grown up now. You're allowed to show feelings! You're allowed to cry! We LIKE that!

Saturday, May 27, 2006

not dead

Contrary to the rumours I am not dead, I am in fact still alive. Sorry :รพ It'sraining, it's pouring and hence my life has become drop dead boring. No photos at the moment, no bloggable (clean) thoughts. *sigh* I think my winter hibernation has begun.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

......

I just feel empty. I need a hug so bad.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Pointless art around Wellington

I don't know if these silver things have braile writing on them or are pretending to be computer chips. I also don't have a clue what the umbrella is about but these are things I pass all the time here and well they just help ro sum up Wellington. Vibrant, odd and awesome.


Friday, May 19, 2006

I do know

I hate being a jealous bitch. If I get shitty about something you're doing or get icy, catty, whiny or generally a pain in the butt please know that I do know I am being jealous and that it is not my best feature. I am trying hard to work on it but it's not easy.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Random Wellington city sights


Hell is a pizza place, one of their branches delivers in a hearse (yes, I am trying to find it). This branch is next to Syn bar

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

oh dear

Oh dear, all those views and not one little comment either way. Sometimes silence is deafening lol.

Confession? or admission? Here goes...

I've been dropping hints about this on NN for the past couple of days but don't yet feel comfortable admitting it on there so heres my first step. The people that read this blog regularly are people I trust with my business. I'm going to become a Domme. Yep, domination, submission, strapons, whips and chains. It's an ongoing process and I don't know how long it takes befoe you can really say you are one but I'm going to at least work towards a point where I feel I can say I'm a Domme and earn the right to be called Mistress by my very own submissive. I like women but mostly only to look at and admire as art so my sub(s) will be male. I've chatted to a friend on IM lately that has been willing to be my little bitch and let me act out both our fantasies in our chats. It's been fun, enlightening and a turn on to talk to someone about this lifestyle who is so open to trying it with me.
Also I think the best bit happened today. The person I was scared of telling the most turned out to be excited, curious and asked me to talk him through a fantasy we share.
I have lost a friend or two though over this and it has made some friendships awkward if not totally over. That definately sucks but at the end of the day I have to live my life for me. I feel happy in this decision and it's not like I'd ever force it on anyone. Domination is not about total bullying ownership, it's surprisingly sweet and tender. Your sub chooses to be owned by you, they give their whole being to you and you have a responsibility to protect them while they are in your charge. There are limits set by both of you on what you each will or wont do, they have a safeword for their protection and aftercare is very important, holding your sub close and giving them your full attention and letting them know they are loved.
The most important point to remember is that (for me at least) he may be by sub but he is always a man. I'm not out to emasculate him or get myself a true sissy boy (no matter what I call him in Humiliation Play). I think the sign of a good Dom/sub relationship is where you live these 2 'unequal' roles yet both feel equal to your partner....if its a long term relationship anyway.
Leave a comment if you want, I'd be interested in feedback. Good or bad, it wont change my choice this time.

Monday, May 15, 2006

Confused

Wow, men are complicated creatures. They expect you to just know what they want and when you make a decision that isnt 'ok' with them they sulk and pout. I have made probably one of the toughest decisions of my life, really more of an admission about who and what I am and I am suddenly finding out that people who were friends aren't really friends after all. That really hurts. But on the positive side I feel better about myself and I have learnt that some friends are true friends and a total blessing. So it's not all bad, just strange territory.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Monarch



My first sighting in years and there was at least 3 flitting around, it almost felt summery. Shame its the beginning of winter :(

More of Eby the cemetery visitor


Monday, May 08, 2006

Saturday, May 06, 2006

I wish

I wish I knew when my life started turning to crap :(

Friday, May 05, 2006

Don't eat while you read the news

Workers find corpse in rum barrel

05 May 2006

BUDAPEST: Hungarian builders who drank their way to the bottom of a huge barrel of rum while renovating a house got a nasty surprise when a pickled corpse tumbled out of the empty barrel, a police magazine website reported.

According to online magazine www.zsaru.hu, workers in Szeged in the south of Hungary tried to move the barrel after they had drained it, only to find it was surprisingly heavy and were shocked when the body of a naked man fell out.

The website said that the body of the man had been shipped back from Jamaica 20 years ago by his wife in the barrel of rum in order to avoid the cost and paperwork of an official return.

According to the website, workers said the rum in the 300-litre barrel had a "special taste" so they even decanted a few bottles of the liquor to take home.

The wife has since died and the man was buried in a proper grave.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006